Jermain Defoe gets tearful opening up on his life, the impact of Bradley Lowery, and manager hopes in an exclusive interview.
He spoke to Sky Sports ahead of a new documentary, and talked about the hunger that drove him on, his relationship with his father, how Bradley Lowery changed him, and his desire to being on the managerial scene.
The documentary film, titled ‘Defoe’, will be released in cinemas for one night at the end of this month, looking back on his life, from success, his playing days, and the more difficult subjects including tragedy.
He says to Sky Sports: “Football was always an escape. When I was playing, I never thought about anything else regardless of what I was going through off the pitch. Then the final whistle goes and all the problems of life comes on top of you.
“I was like that from the age of eight.”
On doing the film: “I think it is important not only for me but for others to do it because I think you see the person behind the footballer.
“It would be nice for people to reflect. See what I have achieved but at the same understand what has gone on away from football.
“There are all these things that people do not know. I do not want people to feel sorry for me, I want them to understand that tough times never last. I just thought it was the right time for people to really understand who I am.”
On the start of his football career, of which he was at renowned London boys club Senrab: “In a crazy way, I think I enjoyed it.”
Then at the age of 16, Charlton sold Defoe to West Ham for £1.6million: “I had not kicked a ball. If we signed a young lad at Tottenham’s academy now, without wanting to put too much pressure on, I would naturally be thinking that you have to justify this fee.”
He went on to score 162 goals in the Premier League, sits 9th on the all-time goalscoring list for the top flight, and made 57 appearances for England.
“I always felt like I had to be better than the person next to me,” he says.
“When I speak to my friends now, they always joke about it. They say, ‘your mindset was completely different to the rest of us’. They would laugh, ‘you never came out. You did not drink. You always stayed behind after training.’ But that is just how I was.
“I went to Rangers at the back end of my career where people could maybe understand that I was not the same player as five years before but I always felt like I had something to prove. That is not just games. That is every training session. That is every gym session.”
🗣️ “Football can give you so much more”
Jermain Defoe on the impact that football has had on his life ahead of the launch of a new documentary on his career 👇pic.twitter.com/nztoIjN3rS
— Sky Sports Football (@SkyFootball) February 16, 2024
On being dragged off the pitch by West Ham’s academy boss Tony Carr: “I think that came from my background, really. I knew that my family had done so much for me. I just felt like I had to give them something back. I was going to do whatever it takes.”
He then opens up on his mother, who he remembers working cleaning toilets to help support he him reach his dream of being a footballer: “There were probably jobs that she never told me about.
“She had me at 18 so it was difficult for her. My mum worked around the clock just to provide but growing up in the East End all I saw around me were people working hard. My nan worked in Tate & Lyle, the sugar factory. My grandad worked in a meat factory.”
On his grandad’s death: “I got a knock on my door at four in the morning. I went to hospital at five. Got back home at nine. Went to White Hart Lane and played the game. I had to keep going. That was my mentality.”
Jermain’s brother Gavin died following an assault in 2009 and then in 2012, lost his father, whom he had a complicated relationship with, to cancer.
He often made Royal Marsden Hospital in London throughout Euro 2012, mentally, he knew he had to just ‘keep going’ when trying to focus on football whilst struggling through such tough times.
“There were things that went on throughout my career,” he says.
“I probably have this thing where I can blank things out. When I look back now, I don’t know how I managed to play or focus and still remain positive. But at the same time you need to be resilient. I felt like I did not have time to be too emotional and sit in a corner and cry.”
Defoe isn’t watching the documentary in full until its premiere, but there is a scene where an associate of his father talks about how Jermain’s Dad would speak with such pride about his son’s achievements.
“Perhaps he did not tell him that,” she says. “But he told everyone else.”
“I am getting emotional,” Jermain responds.
“I always knew that he was proud, to be fair. People separate, it happens. It was just me and my mum for a long period of time. I would always see my dad at family parties and stuff but he had his own struggles. He had his own things that he had to deal with.
“Maybe at the time I did not understand it. I knew in his eyes when he spoke to me that he was proud. I knew that he wanted to be there but he had his own struggles and it was difficult. It was always good but it was in passing if that makes sense.
“We never really had the chance to sit down for hours and speak about what went on. I did not have the time to sit down and speak with my dad on a deeper level. [But] I knew.”
The documentary also sees the former footballer go through a time when he thought he was a father himself, but had a paternity test discovered that the baby wasn’t his.
His Mum explained how the decision he took to move out to Toronto was a moment of him needing to get away from it all.
Soon after, young Sunderland supporter Bradley Lowery fell terminally ill with neuroblastoma, sadly dying in 2017 at the age of 6 years old. Bradley needed his hero Jermain by his side every step of the way, and Defoe also needed him.
“It is strange saying it but I just felt like I was prepared for that moment,” he says.
“But at the same time, how can you prepare for that level of love?
“I am 41 now so I have had experiences where it was difficult to trust people. It does make you paranoid. With Bradley, it was just completely different. From the moment that he jumped on my lap and started speaking, you could just see. It was so genuine.
“He just wanted to be around me and see me every day. It puts things into perspective. I am only human. I moan about things. But there are families in situations that are really tough. It does change you as a person. But I have so many good memories of Bradley.”
He revealed his disgust at the sick Sheffield Wednesday fan who taunted Sunderland supporters by mocking the death of Bradley Lowery earlier in the 2023/24 season.
Questioned about how he felt about what happened at Hillsborough, he told Mail Sport: ‘You just think, “What kind of world are we living in to do that?”.
‘I think you need to have a conscience. That feeling you get when you see someone else upset. To do something like that, where it is calculated, it is hard for me to understand.
‘You know you are not going to get away with it. Surely, they have got family members with kids so can understand what Gemma and Carl (Bradley’s parents) had to go through.
Youth career
Senrab
1997–1999 – Charlton Athletic
1999 – West Ham United
Senior career
1999–2004 – West Ham United – 105 games (41 goals)
2000–2001 → AFC Bournemouth (loan) – 31 games (19 goals)
2004–2008 – Tottenham Hotspur – 176 games (64 goals)
2008–2009 – Portsmouth – 36 games (17 goals)
2009–2014 – Tottenham Hotspur – 186 games (79 goals)
2014 – Toronto FC – 21 games (12 goals)
2015–2017 – Sunderland – 93 games (37 goals)
2017–2020 – AFC Bournemouth – 34 games (4 goals)
2019–2022 – Rangers – 74 games (32 goals)
2022 – Sunderland – 7 games (0 goals)
Total – 763 games (305 goals)
International career
England U16 – 8 games (0 goals)
2000–2001 – England U18 – 7 games (0 goals)
2001–2003 – England U21 – 23 games (7 goals)
2004–2017 – England – 57 games (20 goals)
Managerial career
2021 – Rangers (caretaker)
HONOURS:
Rangers
Scottish Premiership: 2020–21
Scottish League Cup runner-up: 2019–20
Individual
Tottenham Hotspur Player of the Year: 2004
Premier League Player of the Month: August 2009
Sunderland Supporters’ Player of the Year: 2015–16
Sunderland Player of the Year: 2015–16
North-East FWA Player of the Year: 2016
Orders
Officer of the Order of the British Empire: 2018
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