That was just bad judgement on my part. It was supposed to be a joke and it wasn’t a joke. And it turned out just to be an absolute disaster judgement call. It’s given people an opportunity to justify the abuse. But that picture happened in lockdown which is 2020, I’ve been getting abuse since 2012. You have eight years of abuse, where you get it from all angles. You mess up once and it’s labelled against you and it’s like the hate in those eight years, doesn’t matter anymore. It was like ‘you done this, you bring it on yourself.’
I made the stupid call to put it on social media and it annoys me because people actually believe out there that I sat and spoke to my children about the history. Come on. It was just a picture. I grew up straight after the conflict. So it was ingrained in me, I’d seen it first hand.
My kids know nothing about the past and what went on. Whereas it was different for me because I grew up straight in the aftermath. So the people who actually think that I sat there and educated my children on it… honestly, come on.
You used a phrase there, which I think every single time I’ve ever mentioned your name, it’s been said to me. ‘He brings it upon himself.’ I don’t know how people use that as an explanation for abuse, because you were still young in 2012 when you decided not to wear the poppy. You were very respectful and you were very clear about your reasons. You weren’t allowed to articulate it publicly then, you only did that down the line…
Yeah, I explained my reason for not doing so. I haven’t made a a song and dance about it. I just bow my head, I do a silent protest. I don’t jeer, make noise, try and make a big spectacle about it so the whole ‘I brought it on myself’ is just based off that that one stupid judgement call. People don’t want to be educated. People have their views no matter what. Hate on James McClean and it’s popular.
They don’t know why they hate on me. They hate me because the person beside them hates me and they just think they well, that’s the way it goes. On a Saturday when I go to away ground or when away fans come and I’m getting abuse, I’ve used it for fuel, for motivation. It’s kept me going. If you’re abusing me, I’ll use it as motivation. And that’s just because there’s nothing else I can do. So for those 90 minutes, I might as well try and use it to my advantage.
How does all of this affect your family?
My mam is a very anxious, worried person anyway. And yeah, it’s been hard on her because you know, as much as I can take it head on and ‘do your worst’ and whatever to me, but you sometimes forget the people who are dealing with this with me and who haven’t built the same mentality as you.
So it’s been quite scary for my wife. And she’s been quite worried over the years like my mother has been. Sometimes it’s probably my fault where I don’t think about how they’re feeling because I’m just like straight on. It has been quite hard. But like I said, it’s probably never going to change and I’m not expecting a big change.
Have they ever tried to say to you, stop…
Yeah. Oh yeah. The balaclava picture, the fact that I put it on social media I got a fair telling off from all angles for a week. They’ve definitely tried over the years to calm me down.
Have you felt because you have been so alone in this and the only one who wants to correct course and say anti-Irish and anti-Catholic abuse does not belong in football, just like homophobic abuse doesn’t belong in football, racist abuse, or any kind of discrimination that you have had to be on the attack all the time?
Yeah, look, maybe I was a bit naive in thinking you know, with me being the one that took the stand first, it’ll pave way for young Irish lads coming through and it doesn’t seem to be the case. I speak to a lot of people and I’ve had players say that they don’t believe in wearing the poppy and they wouldn’t wear it, but they just don’t want the hassle. So in a way, you know, I was kind of hoping by me doing it that would open a door for them to kind of do that themselves when they’re doing something that they don’t want to do. But probably they’re afraid of the backlash and that’s fine. You know what you don’t want because it’s horrific abuse and it can be quite taxing. So I understand why they don’t want that. But I’m always of the belief that if you don’t believe in something, then, you know, take a stand.
You know what, after all the abuse you’ve endured over 11 years, you are probably going to change things because we have now seen The FA taking action and it shouldn’t have had to take this long…
It’s been a lot of dark days, it has been a struggle. But if I can be the one that paves the way for this to stop and for any young Irish player coming across and you know, if I ever stop them from getting abuse and they feel free to do what they believe and avoid the consequences that would be the ultimate goal. It will be all worth it then.
You mentioned dark days and I know you want to do the whole ‘I’m strong’ approach. But it does permeate?
It does, of course. You might have a bad game and a bad result and you’re off form or you might get taken off or whatever and then you get abuse and you’re already like frustrated, annoyed. And sometimes that can boil over and I probably act off of that and it might trigger a mood for longer than it should. Nobody’s perfect. I mean, like, of course if you were getting constant abuse day in, day out, you know…
It’s not even about being perfect. It’s just human…
In this whole footballing world, you have to be perfect. You have to just be this model professional and, you know, just fall in line with everybody else. And how dare you step out of line? If you step out of line here, you’re controversial. I’ve seen the article already a “controversial 100 cap international joins Phil Parkinson at Wrexham.”
So it’s just like no matter what articles there are about me, even the good ones, there’s always the paragraph about the poppy. It’s just like they recycle the same article over and over every year. Like nobody cares. I’m not going to ever wear a poppy. It shouldn’t be a surprise, let it go. But the media trying to sell papers, trying to get clickbait and trying to whatever.
Have you ever thought, I can’t deal with this anymore?
If I ever thought that, you’re letting them win and I would never do that. I would never do that because I would never give them the satisfaction.
We’ve spoken about the misperception around you. James McClean actually does a lot for charity. And I know you’re probably not going to want to talk about this at all because you do it very quietly. And the only way we ever know that you’ve done it is, is the people you’ve helped coming forward to talk about it.
I think it’s important if you’re in a position to be able to help people who are less fortunate, to do so. Sometimes you have to give a cause a bit of publicity because it can grow legs and it will give a wider range of kind of coverage, bringing in more money and awareness for it. If you want to help but you only do it for selfish reasons, to say, ‘well, look what I’m doing,’ I think that defeats the purpose. The person you’re doing it for will still be appreciative regardless but if you’re constantly making a song and dance about it, then it kind of defeats the purpose.
One thing that’s very close to your heart is autism…
I’m learning each day along with my daughter and so I don’t know already everything about autism. And if I sat here, trying to give it the big one, I would come across as ignorant. Every day is a new challenge. And every time, we learn something new. I wouldn’t change it for the world. Like she’s so content, she’s so happy, and she’s a wee character. I wouldn’t change a thing. It’s definitely made me a better person. So since she’s come along, I’ve matured you know, it’s opened my eyes a lot.
I went and got myself tested and got myself a diagnosis and the way I see it, autism is something I was born with. So if I didn’t have autism, I probably wouldn’t be where I am today. I probably wouldn’t be as as dedicated and obsessed with football like I am. It’s important to raise awareness. I remember when I got my diagnosis and shared it, I had people write ‘oh sorry to hear. Get well soon.’ It just shows you that there’s not really an understanding. It’s not an illness, you can’t get better from it. It’s just something that you are. I’m not ashamed, I’m actually proud that I am autistic and speaking up might help other people to know it doesn’t stop you achieving your goals.
I know external views don’t matter to you because you’re very concrete in yourself and what you believe in. But do you have anything to say to people?
I respect your beliefs, even if I don’t honour them in the way you do, I respect them. All I’m asking for in return is for the same courtesy. Judge me if you spend time with me. Don’t judge me when you don’t know me, because then it just makes you ignorant.
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